New year, New Direction

Welcome back everyone to a new year. Now, I have noticed that in the first week of January, there are usually a bunch of (well meaning) people talking about new year resolutions, setting goals and taking stock. Which is great. In fact, my initial blog that I was going to release on Monday 02 Jan would have been something similar.

However, I decided after reading many articles similar to mine, that I would pause, take some reflection time and write about something a little different. This year, I am going to be more authentic, to myself and my audience.

So, my first blog this year is about mindset and how self-talk can really make or break your goals and plans. I have two beautiful adult daughters, who were raised the same, yet have very different outlooks on life. I pondered; besides genetics, how did I contribute to their self-talk, their successes (and failures) and that’s when I had an epiphany. I realised that as a single parent, I had raised them teaching them about the ‘cost’ of life, as opposed the value of things in life.

Now, I won’t get into all the details here, but my take aways were this:

The language we use to measure things impacts the way we view things. If we use negative terms like cost, we focus on what is being taken away from us.

When we use positive terms to view things, we focus on how the value of whatever it is will add to our life. I’ll give an example. When I started up my coaching business and trying set my price point, I focussed on the cost of coaching someone. The cost of my time, my experience, my education etc.

However, what I failed to realise at the time was ‘what is the value am I bringing’ to a person that is being coached and mentored. How much time (and money) do I save them by helping them identify gaps in their thought processes, bringing out their wisdom by asking things differently to what they are used to, what benefits can I add, and most importantly, the time they save (which can be totally relatable to a monetary value) in reaching their goals.

The way we have been influenced in our lives helps or degrades our self-talk, and most of the time, we aren’t even aware of it.

How we are spoken to, and what we say re-enforces our self-talk in ways that can be uplifting (or damaging). Likewise, how we speak to others can positively or negatively affect outcomes and values of self-worth.

What does this all have to do with my new direction and coaching? Well, I am going to start by taking better care of my self-talk, and how I communicate with others. Furthermore, I will be more value driven rather than cost conscious when I am making decisions about my life direction.